Ok, I know you’ve seen them. The comments on Facebook that are just so….. rude. Mean-spirited. Downright nasty. I’ve almost come to expect it on news pages with hot topics like politics or blogs like the famous Matt Walch’s. But more and more I am seeing hateful comments on decorating and painting sites. “Creative” pages, if you will. And it makes me wonder when on earth did we decide it’s ok to type whatever opinions come to our mind? It’s not wrong to think something is ugly, but it’s just so meannnnnnnnnnnnnnn to type it.
For instance, I was admiring a great piece of painted furniture online on a popular site the other day and my mouth dropped open at the comments. There was name calling y’all ….. over furniture!!!! I so badly wanted to comment…. “girls, girls…. it’s JUST paint”. It blows my mind. But then I really began to think about it and really began to ask for clarity on the rash of negative Facebook comments concerning projects and painting. And I had many things come to mind that I want to share with you:
- First, our society is a feel – good society that often does what feels good at the moment. For some people, it’s not about the paint. They just need to tear someone else down in order to feel themselves being elevated. It’s the new bully on the block if you will. We have to remember it’s an issue on their end. It’s got nothing to do with the color you just painted that piece. Ignore them. Your work is thebomb.com.
- Other times, commenters are just looking for a fight. They want a verbal banter and when you engage them, you feed them. Starve their power trip with NO comments back and they will take their toys and eventually go to someone else’s sandbox.
- I honestly think that deep, deep down we ALL have a desire to be known and to be heard. Social media is a way for people to be “heard” yet still allowing them animosity. So they can comment, with no risk of a fist fight. Ha. But honestly, there are people who feel like they have no voice. No voice at home, no voice at work, no voice in their life. They want SOMEONE to hear and pay attention to them. Social media allows them to be heard. And when you think of it that way, you almost feel badly for the hateful commenter. Not excusing it, just explaining it.
- And sometimes the truth is …. people just have a rough day. And they take it out on stranger’s Facebook pages where there will be no repercussions. I know I have received more than one negative comment on my Facebook page before that was later followed up by an apology from the commenter. I love that. I’m sure we can ALL relate to saying and typing things that we later regret.
So how do I handle negative commenters? My Facebook page has more than 300,000 fans on it, so I get my share of negativity! ha!
The majority of the time, I do nothing.
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But, I do have a few personal rules that I want to share with you that may help you navigate any negativity on your page:
- First, you are in control of your page. You have the God-given ability to “ban and delete”. Learn how to use that function. Your page = your rules. One of my rules is that I don’t tolerate cursing. You cuss on my page and you get a “modern-day mouth washing” in the form of a “ban and delete”. Bye-bye.
- If you tell a dirty joke in the comments of my page, you will also be deleted. I know that sounds totally random, but it’s happened more than once on my page. Go figure.
- When it comes to some people just not liking your personal creations, just remember negative commenting is similar to bad Hollywood behavior. Think of it as any publicity is good publicity. In all honesty, if you are getting negative comments about your piece of painted furniture…. it’s at least a comment. And comments help your post stay in Facebook’s feed, so that is a plus. And more than likely you will get more positive comments in response to the negative comments which brings me to my next point….
- Let your fans fight for you. My fans are like junkyard dogs….. the smell a stinker on my page and they are all over them. And I love them for it. I usually never have to say anything because my loyal, faithful, sweeeeeeeeeet fans (I could just eat you all up) will comment for me. God Bless them. They are the best.
- Sometimes we may just have to get tougher skin. I posted the most bomb-diggity fireplace mantle ever the other day that I glazed and was shocked that 80-some comments later….. a ton of my followers didn’t like it. At one time years ago on my page, I may have been tempted to freak out and wonder if they were right and hesitate to post the next time…… but then I remembered, that mantle I just glazed looked amazing. Like the “I totally wanted to marry it” kind of amazing. I ignored the comments. They are looking at just one little picture. I got to take in the whole house and see it in person. You almost have to tell yourself “blah, blah, blah” as a form of self-protection and move on. Don’t overthink it or you’ll second guess your talent.
And so in closing, if you have a business page and are upset by some of the comments you are getting, just remember the larger your page gets, the more comments you will get and the more comments you get, the more likely you are to get haters. Ignore them. But there are a few things you personally CAN do to help CHANGE Facebook behavior for the good:
- Never comment negatively on other pages or post negatively about someone else’s work or their business. We reap what we sow. If you want God’s blessing on YOUR business, then you’d better be a blessing to others on their pages.
- And we need to be sure we teach our children what some adults still don’t realize…. the golden rule applies to social media, if you can’t type anything nice, just don’t TYPE anything at all.
Creatives…. listen up! I want you to remember what I put on my Facebook page yesterday morning. As a woman, the enemy hates you because you bring life. When you are a creative woman, the enemy hates you because you bring beautiful to the world. When you are a female entrepreneur in the creative world…. the enemy will work OVERTIME to convince you your talent is not good enough because he wants to deter you from creating again. Fight that. Remember the enemy works thru people to discourage us and sometimes….. those people are hateful Facebook commenters.
So, learn to ignore it. Keep going. Keep creating your little socks off and the haters will eventually move along.
This world needs you.
I’m rooting for you,
If you’re feeling like you need a supportive business community to help you grow and deal with creative entrepreneur challenges, please consider joining my Inner Circle. It’s a monthly mentorship that will help you succeed. No negativity!. Sign up for the waitlist HERE, for when the doors open again.
I also have a course that will help you skip ahead in years of learning how to build a creative business online and make MORE MONEY online. This is a six-week course where I give you all the steps you need to monetize your creative talent. See when the Creators Roadmap opens HERE.
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Also for your entertainment, I recently had some trolls come on during a Facebook Live. Here was my reaction: